Dragon Poker 5 Minute Tier List
The concept of conditional modifiers is deceptively simple. It is amodification based on the condition. That is, the rules of the gamechange depending on outside forces. These can be practically anythingfrom the phases of the moon, to details about the room the game isplayed in, to how many hands have been played, etc.
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What makes the conditional modifiers so daunting is three-fold.
First, the modifiers for the most part stack and there is no limit tonumber of modifiers that may in play. For example, several modifierschange the order of the cards. If the order is reversed because it'sthe fifth hand (Conditional Modifier #5) and player tears their sock,dictating the card order inverts from the center (ConditionalModifier #162), the reversed order will be the one that is inverted.
Second, several of the modifiers are vague and very little in therules details how to clarify them, only that the players mustdetermine them, as they must do for the modifiers that come inconflict1.As one or two of rules makes absolutely no sense, most scholars agreethat this was deliberate on the part of the game inventors to make iteven more confusing.
Third, there are are well over two hundred conditional modifiers.What follows is the full list of known conditional modifiers,compiled with the oldest at the top of the list and the youngerfollowing. We recommend that anyone who still wishes to playfamiliarize themselves with all modifiers before they begin, becauseplayers are under no obligation to inform their opponents ofmodifications that benefit them.
It should be noted that every modifier must be played as declared.That is, if the rule is misremembered and played incorrectly, aplayed cannot void the previous hands (and winnings) played underthat rule. However once a mistake is found, the game should continueunder the correct rule.
0. Any omission of the conditionalmodifiers must be determined at the beginning of the session. Playersmay determine this in any way they choose.
1. Unicorns are wild on Tuesdays
2. In months with the letter “M”.Ogres are at half value.
3. Red Dragons are wild oneven-numbered hands.
4. Once a night, a player can changethe suit of one their “up” cards.
5. Every five hands, the sequence ofthe cards is reversed, so the low cards are high and vice-versus.
6. Once a Four of a Kind is played,that card value is dead and blank for the rest of the session.
7. If a Four of a Kind is played withall wild cards, it ceases to be wild and can be played normally.
8. If there is a 10 showing in thefirst two face-up cards in any hand, then 7s will be dead.
9. If another 10 appears, rule 8 willbe canceled out.
10. If the first card turned up in around is an Ogre, the round will be played with an extra hole card(four up and five down).
11. On Tuesdays, the dealing reversesevery seven hands.
12. When all players are of the samegender, the Corps-a-Corps hand is invalid.
13. Once a night, a south facing playermay withdraw their bet at no penalty.
14. When played with spectators, 3swill be dead and considered blank.
15. If there are an odd number ofplayers, hands totaling an even number beat hands totaling an oddnumber of the same rank. The reverse is also true.
16. In every hand after theforty-second, the player facing north can discard one of anotherplayer's face card at anytime.
17. If the sun is out, Hearts becomeSpades and Diamonds become Clubs for Elves only.
18. If there is at least one female atthe table, Ogres and Unicorns may switch names.
19. In played indoors, the declarationof a new wild cards renders the previous wild card tame.
20. If the moon is full, no silver orsilver-colored money, chips, etc. may be bet.
21. If a player is caught lying, theymust play their next hand with all cards face up.
22. If any sort of alarm bell rings,the players must switch positions (after the emergency has beenmanaged) and play their new hands until the end of the round.Afterward, they may return to their original seats.
23. If a romance novel tops the NewYork Times Best Seller list, a hand must contain at least one Ogreand one Unicorn.
24. If the game is played on a drinkingholiday, the players must participate. Every round will be followedby the players chugging a glass of their drink of choice. This willcontinue only so long as all players may safely do so. Betting maycontinue as normal, but exorbitant losses will be considered void inthe morning.
25. If a St. George is played, Dragonsare blank for the rest of the hand.
26. On Valentine's Day, couple may showeach other their hands.
27. If a player plays the Dead Man'sHand, they may not play for the rest of the night.
28. If a player leaves the table, theiropponents are allowed- nay, encouraged- to peek at their hole cards.
29. If there is a sports matchoccurring during on the day of the game and the group consists ofsupporters of both teams, the players must divided into two teams(they need not consist of equal numbers) where they will pool cardsand money, chips, etc. for the session. If there is a discrepancybetween the winning sports team of the above and the winning Pokerteam, the winnings are void. If both winning teams are the same, thewinnings are doubled.
30. If the players are in constant andconsistent motion for the duration of a hand, the values of the facecards are reversed.
31. If a session is held on the day ofthe end of the world or imminent death for the group, chips will beworth $5,000, $10,000 and $25,000. (Local currencies apply)
32. If the world doesn't end or thegroup doesn't die within 24 hours, chips will be worth 10¢, 25¢ and50¢. (Local currencies apply)
33. On weekends, which may extend toFriday nights upon agreement of the players, Unicorns are wild.
34. The overall loser of the hand hasthe option to change a rule for the next hand.
35. If, when playing, a Weird Al songbroadcasts on the radio, the value of the hands reverses.
36. If a cat walks by and sneezes, thebetting must cease for the remainder of the hand.
37. During a blizzard, suits reversevalue.
38. In months without an “R”, ondates with two numbers, the card values corresponding to the dateswitch places (e.g. On August 26, 2 become 6s and vice versa).
39. A power outage shall be considereda free-for-all to grab cards from the other players. Good luck.
40. In the event of an election and apolitician wins, cards will be dealt from the bottom of the deck.
41. If a player wears a purple dressshirt, betting will only occur after all cards have been dealt.
42. If male players outnumber femaleplayers, Ogres and Elves switch places. If female players out numbermale players, Ogres and Unicorns switch places.
43. If any of the players' countriesare at war, Elves are high.
44. If a game is played on a player'sbirthday, the card with the value corresponding to the date becomeshigh. If there is no corresponding value, the player chooses the highcard.
45. If there is a mirror in the room,Dragons are low cards.
46. St. Georges are dead and blank onthe Sabbath.
47. If a hand is in play at thechanging of the hour, all hole cards must be gathered up, shuffledand redistributed.
48. In months with two moons there areonly two suits, determined by color.
49. On the fourth of July, the facecards and St. Georges are dead and blank.
50. If a commercial plays with ananimal mascot, any player with that animal as a pet must immediatelyfold and sit out the rest of the hand.
51. If a play has a relative they call“Auntie”, instead of ante-ing they must cry uncle.
52. If the local radio station allowsrequests during the session the loser of a hand must call in “TheGambler” by Kenny Rogers to continue playing.
53. If a table or space has to becleared for play, then the initial ante does not need to be met.
54. If any sort of cooling system is inuse, Red Dragons are demoted to Unicorns.
55. If a player finds themself in debt,they may only use Clubs until such time as they are out of debt.
56. If extra chairs are required, FullHouse becomes the highest valued hand.
57. If four lights are on in the gameroom, 3s are wild.
58. If a player's significant othercalls to ask when they're coming home, all dealing and betting mustcease and the hands shall be played as is.
59. If a player smokes, they may onlymake hands with black cards.
60. The overall loser of a game orsession will be rechristened by their betters and keep their nameuntil the next new moon.
61. On the Chinese New Year, allDragons are dead and blank.
62. A player who wins with six Unicornsmust relate the loss of their virginity. Their compatriots areforbidden from questioning the veracity of the story nor detailsrelating to it during or afterward.
63. If a player takes two aspirin, around of drinks will be served, a toast will be called and Dragonsare wild.
64. If a player coughs, 7s and Unicornstrade places.
65. If a snack run becomes necessarymid-session, the Full Belly and Full Dragon hands will be invaliduntil the next session (after the current one) that ends withleftovers.
66. If a lightning strike is visible,table cards are gathered up and replaced.
67. If players are using foldingchairs, the players may not fold for the number of betting roundsequal to the number of players divided by the number of foldingchairs (rounded to the nearest whole). If that number is greater thanthe number of betting rounds, no player may fold until the finalround.
68. If a player who was barred fromfolding wins, they may trade spots with another player.
69. When a person sits down at the headof the table, they may dictate the initial order of dealers, dealingand betting.
70. If an adult shorter than five footplays, all cards under 5 will be considered dead and blank.
71. If there is a ceiling fan in thegame room, the value of all cards shift one to the left.
72. If the game is played in a roomwith hardwood, diamonds and hearts switch value.
73. If the deck is found to be missingcards, St. Georges are the high cards.
74. If the walls in the game room aredeclared to be pink, the value of odd number cards are reversed.
75. If the glasses are made of plastic,the second round of betting is canceled.
76. If there are more book cases thanplayers, 5s are the low card.
77. If a player spills a drink thehands will be gathered and redistributed at random.
78. If a canvasser knocks at the door,half the pot will be removed and equally redistributed.
79. If two players share a name, theymust trade hands after the second round of betting every other hand.
80. If a Four of a Kind of Unicorn isplayed on Christmas, that player wins and Diamonds become high.
81. If anything breaks during a hand,the dealing and betting order reverses.
82. If birds can be heard, the 3s and8s trade spots.
83. If the weather, changes in any way,the new high card will be chosen from the top of the deck.
84. If the heat is commented on morethan twice, the most valuable hand will been invalidated. This willcontinue with each additional comment until no more hands are valid.
85. If the window has blinds, the firstbet must also be blind as a show of solidarity.
86. In a haunted house, Ogres becomethe lowest ranking face card.
87. If one player is a godmother, shemay not use Elves in her hand.
88. If the deck contains cards fromanother deck, that card is the low card.
89. If a player provides high-qualitysnacks, they will be allowed an extra hole card. If a player provideslow-quality snacks, they will be dealt an extra up card.
90. If all players a drinking warmingbeverages, Dragons gain value equal to the number of drinks.
91. In Spring and Fall, Hearts are thehigh suit.
92. If the facilities are underconstruction, the game will begin with only thirteen cards. Thirteenmore cards will be add the next hand and so on until the deck iscomplete.
93. If played in view of a swamp, blackDragons are wild.
94. If played on a border, betting willonly occur on odd-numbered dealing rounds.
95. It the weather is unseasonable thecards will be set out according to current value (e.g. 2, 3, 4, 5,etc.), even numbered cards will be put at the back of the order lineand odds at the front. Once completed, players will have the neworder (e.g. 0, 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, 3, 5, 7, 9, E, U, D).
96. A player wearing a jacket at thetable bets after players without jackets.
97. A player wearing a jacket at the table bets after players without jackets.
98. If a romantic couple plays withother, single players, they may not use pairs.
99. If two players arrive wearing thesame clothes, the next hand will be played just between them. Theywill have to share the same cards up cards, but their hole cards willbe there own.
100. If anything comes through thewindow, everyone folds and the pot is held over until the next hand.
101. If a player sits down at the tablewearing a hat, the money, chips, etc. will be pooled into it. The hatwill be passed around and the players will pick one unit out at atime until it's all distributed.
102. If the game room has weapons ondisplay, St. George's replace Elves.
103. Once a Four of a Kind with Dragonsis played, the Full Dragon Hand is invalid.
104. If the day number (by year) isdivisible by a card value that card is high. If the day number isdivisible by more than one card value, the card is low if the numberof divisible card values is even and high if it's odd.
105. If there is a poster of a musicianon the wall, three cards are sufficient to make a straight.
106. If the wind blows to the east,then one set of even number of cards will be gathered, shuffled andflipped over one at a time. The order in which they are revealed, isthe order they are valued.
107. If an infomercial is playing onthe TV at the time of the dealing begins, betting will occur afterevery card is dealt.
108. In months where the first day ofthe month is a Wednesday and the last day is a Tuesday, every otherplayer may only use Spades and Hearts. The rest can only use Clubsand Diamonds.
109. Every 19th round (crosssession), up to six left over cards will be used as table cards foreveryone.
110. When only family members areplaying, no hand is valid that doesn't utilize at least two facecards.
111. On the equinox, the number of holeand up cards must also be equal. In the Spring, one extra face cardwill added and in the Fall, one will be excluded.
112. When playing in sight of whitepines, there is only one suit.
113. If you are within seven miles of abody of water, then 4s are promoted to St. Georges.
114. In months where there is a bloodmoon, the values of even numbered card is doubled and the values ofodd numbered cards are halved.
115. If any player saw a foreign flagon the day of the game, there will be no wild cards.
116. If all sides of the table areoccupied, players may discard their hole card in an attempt to builda better hand. However, this may only be done once all other cardshave been dealt.
117. If the leaves have begun to fallfrom the trees, the high suit becomes the low suit.
118. If an error is made in dealing,hands will be valued based on the sum of the card values. However,the hands must still be valid Dragon Poker hands.
119. If the dealer owns a car made bythe Big Three, hands must repeat no suits or they will be invalid.
120. If there is a rainbow in the sky,flushes and straight flushes are invalid.
121. When a game is played on the lastor first day of the season, the order of hands must be rearranged forthe session. How this is done is left to the discretion of theplayers, but it must be completely random.
122. If any of the players have facialhair, all hands dependent on the number of cards must be divisible bythe number value of the card (e.g. a pair must be divisible by two).
123. If the players are eating Chinesetake out, 3s are wild and Three of a Kind is the highest hand.
124. If the majority of players haveseen the movie the group is watching, 6s will be considered dead andblank.
125. If two separate rules make a carddead and blank, that card is a zombie card. If it appears in aplayers up cards, it must be removed from the deck. If it's in aplayer's hold cards, their hand is dead (However, the player canstill win by bluffing)
126. If a cover of a classic rock songplays on a commercial 5s, 6s, 7s and 8s are dead and will beconsidered blank.
127. If a child under the age of sevenis in or enters the perimeter, a player may ask one of the otherplayers if they have any of a specific cards and the other playersmust surrender the card.
128. For the entire duration ofFebruary, in lieu of money, player will bring clothes to bet.Gambling will continue until such time as at least one player iscapable of surviving the winter.
129. If there is road work in underwayin the immediate vicinity, 10% of the pot must remain behind when thepot of a hand is won. Any money left over at the end of the sessionwill be held until the next session.
130. When there's a fog or mist, firsttwo rounds of betting must be blind and there shall be seven holecards.
131. For three weeks after Labor Day,no card will be made blank.
132. When DVDs out-number books in thefacilities, the rules are locked down.
133. If the dealer arches the cards inboth directions equally, the value of all cards is doubled.
134. If the facilities are messy, thedealing and betting will proceed in an alternating order.
135. If the home the session is beingheld in is part of a home owner's association, Four of a Kind is thewinning hand.
136. If the game is played above thethird floor, 2s are wilder.
137. If anyone playing is wearing brownshoes, 10s are promoted to face cards.
138. If a card slides off the table,the dealing and betting order reverses immediately.
139. If played outdoors, all face cardsare Elves.
140. If the wind changes direction, theplayer with most betting units must trade hands with the player withthe least betting units and fold.
141. If the game is played with anon-Dragon Poker deck, raising prior to the second round of bettingis forbidden.
142. A player who goes above and beyondthe call of duty to hide the game from disapproving authority figurescan change the rules the next hand.
143. If one player stakes anotherplayer, the staked player plays with one less card.
144. If a card flips facing up in thedeck, it must remain so. If the aforementioned card is dealt as an“up' card, it can be played as normal. If it's dealt as a holecard, it must be flipped over with the rest at the end and the backis the card's value.
145. On Leap Day, all conditionalmodifiers are invalid.
146. If a song repeats on the radio,the players must, on the next hand, bet the exact same way they didon the hand they played the last time the song played.
147. If cloud cover prevents the starsfrom being seen at night, Diamonds are dead and blank.
148. In a month where the 6th is aFriday, players must donate as many betting units to the pot as theircards as their have suit symbols.
149. When an airplane can be heardoverhead, 4s become 7s for the purpose of Three-of-a- Kinds.
150. In the Year of the Dragon, St.Georges are defeated by Dragons.
151. If there's good news on the frontpage of the local paper, half the pot will be given to the winner andthe rest will be divided between any player who had a flush.
152. If a nationally covered trial isunder way, every player is required to tell other players if theyundervalued their hand.
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153. If alliteration appears in thegame room, 2s & 3s equal 2.5, 4s & 5s equal 4.5 and 6s and 7sequal 6.5.
154. At Sunrise, the value order of thecards is Hearts and Diamonds. All other cards are blank. At Sunset,the value order of the cards is Spades and Clubs. All other cards areblank.
155. If a player arrives late, thesequence of cards will reverse every seven hands instead of everyfive.
156. If a player claims or isdetermined to be supernatural creature by other players, they arebanned from using face cards.
157. If all players are wearingcostumes, each can change the identity of one of their cards onceduring the session.
158. If the facilities are made ofbrick, one player during a session may be forced to fold once and onemay be barred from folding once.
159. If there is turntable in the room,the players' betting units will rotate at an interval of hands equalto the the number of players until each has their original holdings.
160. If any player is wearing clotheswith a tear in them, the order of cards inverts from the center (e.g.7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 8, D, U, E, 10, 9).
161. A player wearing glasses isforbidden from using 4s or hands that utilize Four-of-a-Kinds.
162. A player with more than 12.5%Irish ancestry can win with clubs over an otherwise equal hand. Otherplayers may rightfully demand proof.
163. If two or more players go for thesame seat at the start of the session, Spades are demoted toDiamonds.
164. If the dealer has an odd number ofteeth, the order in which hole and face cards are dealt is reversed.
165. If the game table is round, thegame must be played on the floor.
166. If the game session is held infacilities that have pillars anywhere on the premises, 9s become 4s.
167. If two or more players makephysical contact, they must play the next hand against each otherwithout any other players.
168. If more than ten buttons arepresent, the value of the cards is based on the number of suitsymbols on the card (e.g. Ogres become 2s, 8s become 10s, etc.).
169. If the players spot a UFO, allface cards are equal.
170. A player with two differentcolored eyes may call a straight a straight flush if every suit isrepresented.
171. A player with facial hair may notuse St. Georges.
172. If the lawn outside needs mowing,Spades are high. If Spades are already the most valued suit, eachSpade is worth double.
173. If the game is held below sealevel, only Diamonds are in play every eight hands.
174. If there is fresh fruit in thefacilities, the deck must be cut by every player.
175. If a phone rings, Hearts are deadand blank for the remainder of the hand.
176. If a player gets cut and stops thebleeding within 60 seconds, they may only use black cards. If aplayer gets cut and fails to stop the bleeding within 60 seconds,they may not use hearts.
177. If the session starts during theday and continues into the night, the rules reset.
178. A floral table cloth means theplayers must play Australian rules Dragon Poker.
179. If any player is wearing pins, thevalue of Full House, Full Belly and Full Dragon hands reverse order.
180. Military personnel can use St.Georges as high cards.
181. If the table has ring stains, 6s,8s, 9s, 10s, Ogres and Dragons are dead and blank every time dealingduties return to the original dealer.
182. During the Witching Hour, everyplayer plays with all hole cards.
183. Every time the light flickers, thedealing and betting order reverses.
184. If there is an aquarium in thegame room, Three Pair is the winning hand.
185. During the high tide, every playermust raise during betting.
186. If a bug walks across the table,every player takes their middle card(s) and gives them to the playerthree spaces down.
187. If the building has old-fashionedlocks, 5s are wild.
188. If the pot exceeds $500,000, theplayer have the option to eliminate half the rules.
189. After a rainstorm, Straights andStraight Flushes are invalid.
190. Fraying carpet means dealing andbetting alternates every other player (starting with the dealer),until everyone is done.
191 If two players share a birthday andthere is a difference in age, they must each draw 6 cards at thebeginning in the session. Whoever has the best hand may veto oneaction of the other player once during the session.
192. On the last day if the month, onlythree players may play at a time.
193. Every twelve hands, the order ofthe suits is the order they appear in the up cards.
194. If there's a maple tree in thefront yard, no one may raise if the first up card is a Spade.
195. If a player's age is equal to orless than the highest value card by number, they may not bet cash.
196. If the first up card of everyplayer is upside down, no one may raise.
197. If the window panes form a cross,the deck shall not be shuffled on the first day of odd number week(by year). Instead, the cards will be gathered up and dealt toplayers in a different order every time until all possible optionsare exhausted.
198. If any player wears a short shirtin winter, the low card and the high card switch places.
199. In the event of flooding, thevalue of the cards of the two lowest suits will increase by one everyhand until either the flooding stops or the players are forced tomoved to higher ground.
200. If there is a genuine filibusterin the senate, the session may not end until the filibuster ends.
201. If two different styles of chairsare used, the odd numbered cards will trade places with the immediatelower even card.
202. If the road outside is not paved,the sequence of the cards shifts three places to the right.
203. If there is glitter on the floor,Diamonds are high.
204. If there is a red sky at night,shuffling will be done by taking the top and bottom cards from thedeck and placed at the bottom of the new deck (This does not need tobe exact).
205. If a player drinks from the wrongglass for the beverage, he or she deals every third hand.
206. If a procession goes by, bettingceases until the road is clear.
207. If a player uses ice in theirdrink, the session must end before it all melts or the winnings arevoid.
208. If the ceiling is slanted is, 6sor 7s are wild, depending on whether Dragons are high or low.
209. The presence of pinstripes meansSpades & Diamonds and Hearts & Clubs are the same suits.
210. During Midterms or Finals Week,the game should be held in a place of study out of respect.
211. During harvest time, players willtake half their bets back from the pot before the winner takes therest.
212. A player who wins seven hands in arow must play the next hand blind.
Dragon Tier List
213. When the Dragon sings, playersmust switch seats by moving to the right every hand until the getback to their original seats.
214. On days when Good Friday falls onFriday the 13th, the card with value equal to number of players shallbe dead and played as blank.
215. If the game is played on theeclipse every other player must play only red cards. The rest mustuse only black cards.
216. On the day of the Buick Open,Clubs are dead and blank.
217. On days with horse races, 3 Ogresor Elves equal a Unicorn.
218. If the Detroit Lions play in theSuperbowl, all face cards are wild. If the Detroit Lions win theSuperbowl, all non-face cards are wild.
219. On alternate Thursdays, Clubs arethe high suit.
220. If a card from another game issuccessfully snuck in after the session has begun and one roundplayed, the card is valid and must be used in the manner intended bythe original game.221. If there is a rainbow in the sky, Flushes andStraight Flushes are invalid.
222. On St. George's Day, St. Georgescan only form pairs with Unicorns.
223. If anyone makes a pun, St. Georgescease to be wild.
224. If there is a wobbly chair leg,the low card is dead and blank.
225. If played on a even-numberedparallel line, once during the session one player may make the valueof their card numbers equal to that of another.
226. If played in the SouthernHemisphere, the opposite and reverse of every conditional modifierinstruction should be followed.
Dragon Ball Tier List
227. If the backs of the cards are notblue, the dealer plays with two extra hole cards.
228. If the wood paneling is painted,card values with angles reverse order.
229. If there is a surge protector inthe room, the pot must be divisible by the number of players timestwo.
230. If a player has an upturned orhooked nose, they deal third, but bet second.
231. If a baby cries, the cards must bereturn to the deck immediately and all winnings must return to theiroriginal holders. The session begins again.
∞. If a player devises a newconditional modifier, they should bring it before their group. If metwith approval, it shall be added to the list and stand as officialfor all time.
1 To help on this end, many players look at other modifiers for precedent.